As I sit here looking at my screen, I am wondering a few things about my life as an artist, and its confusing. I have just rejoined the “real world” in a way that is both confining and apparently necessary. I have taken a job. I know many of you who consider yourselves artist have one, and still manage to do both. I’m having a hard time adjusting.
I started my artistic life late in life and after family and jobs that I really loved I found a piece of me that made me feel complete. Now I still feel the passion continuously but have to saddle it with the other work I do. With this endeavor the conflict within is strong and sends strong feelings of resentment towards everything I do. Selfish? I’m sure some of you think so. I do have responsibilities and commitments that I am responsible for. The paychecks will help and the feelings of resentment will subside after a while as I re-assimilate into the world of the working, but the artist in me will always be fighting to get out.
I know that we can’t always get what we want and have to face our own demons as we live, and as I face this one, I hope that the passion that exists finds the power to pop the cap on the bottle from the inside.
You have the same experience? Insights to overcome? I’d love to hear.